Kiwi Sue reminded me several months ago that Saturday is Madonna’s 50th birthday. Even though she can’t sing or act her way out of a paper bag I can understand her appeal during her prime. She was mighty hot, even in those Playboy pictures with the hairy armpits. Now she’s dried up and scary looking and I don’t know what Alex Rodriguez sees in her, unless he’s got a thing for over-the-hill gay icons. In which case his to-do list probably also includes Bette Midler and Cher. And Richard Simmons.

Texas Lightning “Like A Virgin” (Madonna)
This song sounds very nice as a heartfelt country song. It’s sort of touching.

Petty Booka “Material Girl” (Madonna)
I never miss an excuse to post a song from my favorite Tokyo bluegrass honeys. The phonetic singing, the ukuleles– they just slay me.

Jack Johnson and G. Love “Holiday/Who Do You Love” (Madonna/Bo Diddley)
This one starts out as an earnest acoustic song, devolves into freestyle rap and ends up with Bo Diddley’s swagger. It sounds horribly ill-advised when you describe it, but it works much better when you listen to it.

Switchblade Symphony “Lucky Star” (Madonna)
This song really brings out the obsessive stalker aspect of the lyrics. It’s shimmery and unsettling at the same time.

Rufio “Like A Prayer” (Madonna)
Madonna’s video for this song featured her shocking the bourgeoisie by having stigmata. That somehow makes a punk cover of the song seem appropriate to me.